Dear Stay At Home Mom,
The day you clocked out of your job for the very last time knowing that your days would from now on be filled with sweet snuggles from your babies and memories you would never be able to replace was one of the best days of your life. You talked with your husband for months until finally agreeing that stepping away from a paycheck and getting paid in the reward of raising your children was the very best option for your family- and you knew it would come with sacrifice, but oh, you knew it would be worth it. The adrenaline built as you tried to keep busy and look like you were working until the clock struck “you’re finally done”. Joy filled your heart as you got in your car and drove away from the corporate work life and toward the life of a stay-at-home-mom.
The next morning when you woke up you didn’t have to rush to get out of the house, try to get your babies ready for day-care, make sure everyone had lunches packed, or even set an alarm. Instead, your husband kissed you on the forehead as he left for work and you lay in bed, still in your pajamas, snuggling your little ones. “This is the best decision I ever made”, you thought to yourself. You all got out of bed together and headed to the kitchen to make breakfast- everybody got to take a nap and went down when and where they were supposed to, and the rest of the afternoon was full of play time and even a little laundry-Completely casual, relaxed, and dream-like. You even had time to make a nutritious dinner and have it ready for your husband when he walked through the door- and he was thrilled. This slice of heaven went on for a couple of weeks and you felt on top of the world.
But then, reality kicked in. The rose-colored glasses came off as everyone realized that being with
mommy all day wasn’t just a special treat, but in fact their new every day routine. All of a sudden you found yourself wanting to pull your hair out and whatever cloud nine emotion you once had was replaced with utter terror. All day everybody was on their worst behavior- temper tantrums, no naps, food all over the floor, disobedience, multiple time-outs, and you swore you heard yourself tell your 15 month old “wait until your father gets home!”, because…. you know… he totally understands that. “Was this really the right decision?”, you asked yourself, as you lay awake on your bed fighting tears during nap time one day. “I don’t know if I can do this much longer”.
Just then you hear “MAMA!” from the other room, and you go in to see what’s going on. Your littlest one had a nightmare and needed his mama, and as you reach for him, the sleepiest sweetest smile spread across his face. He sweetly lays his head on your shoulder and goes right to sleep, so you sit in your rocker and rock him. Suddenly, all of the doubt terror, and frustration fly out the window and you are replaced with the single most content feeling in the world: peace. “This is worth every single second” you think to yourself. And you know that you are exactly where you are meant to be.
To all my stay-at-home-mama sisters: I see you, I hear you, I feel you, I know you, I love you, and I stand with you. You are not alone. Take a deep breath and don’t give up. You are doing the most important job that you could ever do- raising your babies. When you doubt your position and decision to stay home with them, remember every quiet and still moment, every sweet memory, and remind yourself that in the end, it is all worth it. You can do this.
Your SAHM Sister
Written by Ann collins