We asked our twin mom community to give one piece of advice to soon-to-be twin moms. Here’s what they said.
1. Schedule, schedule, schedule…
Getting them on the same schedule is a game-changer! Every parent of singletons will tell you to never wake a sleeping baby. Let me tell you: this rule does not apply to multiples. When one wakes to feed, wake the other. Feed, change diapers, get straight back to bed. If they go to sleep at roughly the same time, you’ll have a higher chance of actually getting some sleep yourself!
2. Don’t buy two of everything
Contrary to what people say, you do not need to buy two of everything. Because:
A) They won’t necessarily like the same things – there’s no point in buying two expensive swings before you’re sure the babies actually like them. B) Your twins won’t use everything at the same time, so it won’t always be necessary to buy two.
3. Take all the help you can get
Utilize everything the hospital offers: the nursery, the lactation nurses, the sleep, the call button, meds, pumps, dining options and everything in-between. Swallow your pride and accept help when it’s offered. Having someone round to watch your babies so you can have a quick shower or even a nap is so valuable. Take the help and don’t be afraid to tell them exactly what you need; whether it’s cleaning, cooking, errands, or rides – you’ll be surprised to learn that most people actually want to help.
4. Don’t be afraid to say no
It’s OK to tell people NO they can’t hold, touch or kiss the babies. Two sick babies isn’t worth the people-pleasing. Also, don’t be afraid to ask people to wash their hands before touching them. Your babies, your rules.
Buy a Twin Z Pillow – it’ll help hugely when breastfeeding your babies at the same time. The Boppy Loungers also provide perfect little nests for propping, tummy time, and sitting – giving you a safe, hands-free moment.
6. Remember it’s OK if you decide not to breastfeed
Don’t be hard on yourself if you decide not to breastfeed. That sh*t is HARD. Moms who who breastfeed twins are amazing. But so are moms who don’t. Everyone and every situation is different. There are plenty of bottle feeding kits on Amazon to help you get started.
7. Trust your intuition
Trust your intuition and your mom skills – even if these are your first! Take advice, but also feel free to throw it out the window if you know it’s not going to work for you and your family. And remember, don’t take advice from people who don’t have twins (just kidding… kind of).
8. Don’t compare yourself to the “perfect” moms on social media
The reality is… they don’t exist. Remember social media is someone’s highlight reel. If you share your stories online, consider sharing the ‘bad’ stuff too. It may help someone else out more than you’d think.
9. Don’t compare your twins
Yes, they are twins, but they are also two individuals. Don’t be disheartened if their needs are different.
Plus, try to have one-on-one time and build a bond with each of them separately as much as possible.
10. Remember it’s OK to not enjoy every moment
It’s OK to cry when they cry. Breathe. Take each day (or even hour) as it comes. It will get better. We promise.
11. Capture as many moments as possible
Take pictures and videos of them both together and separately. They’ll be one and walking before you know it!
A unique idea that one mom suggested was to open an email account for each of them. When you’re having a sleepless night, write to them; tell them about your day and what they’ve done. Make sure you document milestones because it all becomes a blur. They’ll appreciate reading it back when they’re old enough to understand.
12. Stay off Google
If possible, stay away from Google during your twin pregnancy. It’ll cause you so much more stress than it’s worth. Always always always call your OB/MFM and ask them about your concerns.
13. Get a remote controlled rocker
14. Build extra time into plans
Everything will take considerably longer when you have twins to look after. Bear this in mind when planning outings. Don’t be afraid to say no or cancel plans if it doesn’t work for you and the twins.
15. Wear your babies
Baby wearing will help you immensely. Unless you have two people with two carts while grocery shopping, you aren’t going to buy much. There are a number of different carriers available on Amazon that will make life 100 times easier!
16. Write everything down
I repeat: WRITE EVERYTHING DOWN. Every day is a new spread sheet. Trust me: you’ll forget who you just fed and how much you fed them. If you prefer putting pen to paper, this cute ‘one day at a time’ journal will do the job.
17. Carry the car seats PROPERLY
This will probably blow your mind.
18. Get a multifunctional stroller
A good, multifunctional stroller will make a world of difference. A lot of twin moms choose the Contours Options stroller. It has a huge basket, and you can change the bucket car seat holders out for seats once they’re bigger. It’s extremely light and folds up nicely so it can stay in your vehicle at all times.
19. Don’t listen to the negative comments
Before the twins have arrived, you’ll have heard every horror story in the book. Being a twin mom is truly an amazing experience and there’s much more to mention than the ‘lack of sleep’.
20. Most importantly, keep eggs in the fridge at all times
They’ll save your life when you’re too tired to cook. Seriously.